HOW MEN CAN HELP THEIR PARTNERS AROUSED

1. LET HER KNOW YOU WANT HER

Your lover doesn’t just want to feel like you want sex from her. She wants to feel like you want  her. There are a lot of ways to do it. The things you say and the way you touch her (more in just a bit) are important. But don’t underestimate the power in the way you look at her.

One of those looks of intent from my man. The kind that make me want to melt as he gives me a teasing kiss and whispers, “later, baby.”

To me, the greatest aphrodisiac in the world is a person who thinks I’m sexy and desires me. How can you not help but be turned on?

2. KNOW WHERE TO TOUCH HER

Many of our readers discussed how they melt when they partners touch them just right, and we don’t just mean below the belt. One popular spot? The collarbone. The neck is also one way to get her juices flowing. But you don’t need to take it from us.

Have him hold your face and kiss you slowly. Teasing you with his tongue. Kiss your neck and all along your collar. Works every time

Men tend to go straight down south. The body needs to be [awakened] waken before jumping right in.

Ears are another fan favorite!

What really gets me going is when my man swirls his tongue around in my ear. It drives me insane and makes me willing to do absolutely anything he says. He also nibbles and gently bites my ear. It makes me so sensitive all over my body.

I absolutely love when my fiancé kisses the back of my shoulder up to my neck and ears!

Discover the surprising erogenous zones and try touching them instead of heading directly between her legs.

3. SHOW HER YOU CARE

It might sound cliche that a woman will be more likely to want sex after you’ve done the dishes, but there’s definitely a kernel of truth to it. There are a few reasons for this. First, these thoughtful measures show your partner that you care, and this makes her more likely to want sex with you. One woman replied,

What works best for me is to come home from work to a clean house and dinner on the table

Of course, if you do your share at home or help with the kids, she will have  time to sit down to breathe and relax and think about sex. As one reader puts it:

We want our man to step in a give us a break in life so we have the time to feel sexy again.

Hear that, gentlemen? She wants to feel sexy so she can get aroused!

The way you approach this can help her to get horny or turn her off. And whether you have sex or that sex is quality affects relationship happiness

4. TAKE HER OUT

A date night is a powerful tool. Making time for a date is more romantic than straight up scheduling sex, and it gives both of you a chance to think about what’s coming. It gives her a chance to dress up not only to impress you but also to boost her own confidence.

If my husband texted me he was taking me out tonight and to get beautiful, I would be turned on and looking forward to the surprise of tonight!!

So plan a special night. Perhaps recreate your first date or the night you proposed. Or you can do something you’ve never done before to make new memories. Just put in effort that shows your attention is all on her, and she’s going to get aroused much easier – and focus her attention on you in return.

5. RESPECT HER RESPONSE CYCLE

If you don’t already know your partner’s response cycle, have a talk with her about it. The two of you might be able to pinpoint which model best represents how she gets horny. We know that some women only feel desire  after they feel arousal. This means that a rousing bout of oral sex might get her in the mood, and you shouldn’t necessarily wait to stimulate her until after she feels desire.

Some of our readers agree!

I find receiving oral can put me in the mood. It is more satisfying than having oral when I am already horny. And I mean oral that doesn’t just concentrate on the clitoris, but everywhere down there. Even rimming gets me in the mood.

Well when I’ll have [a] difficult time getting aroused, all it takes is oral sex to get me ready.

So you shouldn’t necessarily give up if she doesn’t want to have sex right away. She may get turned on if you start with a sensual massage or go down on her before she’s really in the right headspace. In fact, one male reader describes how he helps his partner get horny:

I lightly massage her back and buttocks and carefully kiss and caress her lower back, back of knees and around her vagina, around is key word.

Another woman who answered our survey explained how the way her man starts helps her get in the mood.

Fleeting hands, then lingering hands. Kisses from behind and small whispers of things to come. Some times never before performed acts requested.

Understand that we don’t recommend trying to coerce your partner into sex because you “know” she’ll get horny eventually if she just goes with it. But if she’s willing to go ahead before she’s horny, things might turn around. Another option? Masturbate and let her watch. Several readers responded to our survey that this was a huge turn on!